The menarche

I can never forget my first menstrual period. The bleeding was profuse and heavy. It started on May 31, 2000. I woke up in the morning and saw blood in my cloth. It was really shocking for me. I had knowledge about menses but experiencing it was quite different. I felt extremely helpless and depressed. Moreover, my mamma was not with me at that time. She had to go to her office for some urgent work. I called her and said "I have got my periods mamma. I want you to be with me". My mother asked me to calm down and not panic. But it was really a tough time for me. I tried dealing with my first menses in a sensible way.

I remember how difficult it was for me accept this new change in my body. I was worried about the monthly bleeding scenario. I had my menstrual bleeding for more than 20 days for the first time. I could not get up from the bed to even fetch a glass of water for myself. School also became challenging for me because of heavy menses. It was not easy to accept the reality that I had entered womanhood in such a tragic manner. Those profuse and heavy menses were not less than a tragedy for an adolescent of elven years. I was even unaware of my bleeding disorder at that time. I used to talk to my classmates about their menses. I always got same answers from each one of them. Most of them used to have periods for three or five days and their flow of bleeding was not as drastic as mine. This was actually not digested by me. I used to wonder about my menstrual bleeding pattern. Most of the time I was lost in my worry of having unexpected periods. There were times when I used to be bleeding free for only four or five days in a month.

In the beginning, periods became a major challenge and an unsolved mystery for me and my mamma. I always discussed about my irregular periods and heavy flow with my mother. Talking to her really really helped me. She used to tell me about her own experiences and guide me as to how I should deal with my menses. Psychological and emotional support is very much required by the adolescent girls entering womanhood. And if they have a history of  bleeding disorder then such girls must be cared a little more than those girls without bleeding disorder. My mamma being a mental health professional took care of all my psychological ups and downs. I was fortunate to have an understanding mamma who took care of me in my tough time.

Well, the first period is usually not easy for a teenage girl who has a bleeding disorder (if undiagnosed till menarche). There are questions which are not answered properly either by the parent or the doctor because most of them have no knowledge about bleeding disorders of females. It is the girl who has to suffer with that pain and frustration.

My request to all the moms of teenage girls is to talk to your daughters as much as you can about menses, the myths and truth associated with it. Help your daughters deal with menses in a better way, especially if your girl has a bleeding disorder. Consult your doctor and please do not think that heavy, profuse and prolong menses are normal for girls who have started menstruating recently. There could be an underlying bleeding disorder leading to heavy  and profuse menses. I was unaware of all this when I started menstruating. I don't want other girls to go through the same pain which I had to experience because of my bleeding disorder. So please take your heavy menstrual bleeding seriously.